Are you talkin' to ME?

So we sent to church today. I have to say, we don't always get to go, because someone may be ill here, and I don't want others to be sick, so we stay home. Usually if Pat were around, he and I would alternate as to who goes to church, and who stays at home. Back when I was a Sunday school teacher, well, that was a no-brainer. I went, he stayed  behind. Also, there are times, when we are away camping (cant wait for warm weather), or when I get to go out (very rare) on Saturday night, and I just can't get up the energy to bother struggling with 3 kids to get them out the door the next morning.

So anyways, the boys and I went to Church this morning. Now I had not slept much last night, and I was praying that it wouldn't be one of those sermons that just lulls you in to the zone land where you are hardly even there. The Scripture is read, (Phillipians Chapter 4) and I perked right up. One of the things I say to myself often, is Phillipians 4:13..." I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me". So many times, on so many days, I just wanna crawl under a rock. I just wanna go back to bed. But I can't. I couldn't even imagine what this house would look like if I did! lol
So he starts talking about Anxiety, and stress, and how we control these things with our mind, and that anxiety is a decision we make, it is not the devil sitting on your shoulder, telling you what to do... and so on. I started wondering if someone I knew called this guy up to tell him that I was under extreme stress and anxiety and that I am on medication for it... but I didn't hear my name mentioned... maybe it was an anonymous tip... ! I expected to zone out at church today, and instead, I got the total opposite result ! And I just felt like he was talking directly to ME, and nobody else. How do they do that???!!!  Yes, it has happened to be before, but it has been a really long time since I thought that the pastor's message was just for me. I have been through so much these past few years, Church was put on the very back burner, heck- it was so far distant, lets just say that the burner I had put Church on, was at our old Vacation Home in New Hampshire! LOL it just was not on the top of my list. I had to get through all my other struggles going on.
And Yes, I am still struggling, and with less family members. Half of my family is now gone, they have died. I am not talking about my Husband, who is alive and well, serving over in Korea- not by much of a choice. I miss him dearly, and so do the kids. Every single day is a battle, a struggle with the house, the kids, the dogs, the cat and my 1 fish (people love the fish story, ha ha). I just get through the days. This minister today really shocked me, I couldn't believe it... I still am shocked!