He will be coming home soon...

Yes folks, it is true. Hubby is expected back on U.S. soil, in about 2 weeks! His return date got switched around a few times, but he has told me, that he will be landing in Boston, on October 7th (at 1:30 AM, which is a time I would rather not even think about, with 3 kids on a school night..)! We here at home are very excited that he will be coming back. However, we have been apart for a year. We will need some time to re-adjust, and get used to having him back at home again. He wants to go and see his family, who live in New Jersey, so we will also be making a trip there (5 hours in the car, not too-too bad, could be worse, lol).




I wonder if he might think I have changed at all. I have been through a whole lot here, this past year. He knows about everything that has happened, and I am just drained and burned out from it. Having to deal with 3 very active boys is not easy. It doesn't help that they are all considered special needs. I have had my hands beyond full. I haven't had a good night of sleep, since I don't know when. When Pat comes home, I have told him, I want to take, like a week off, ALONE... but I don’t think it will happen. I know better than to think something awesome like that would take place for me. I can't imagine coming home, after living completely alone for a year, to a houseful of kids, and pets, and chaos... but that is exactly what he is coming home to!



I had set some goals in my mind, of things I wanted to get done around the house, before Pat returned from Korea. I haven't finished even 1 goal. Just the thought of these goals, makes me tired. I am just so exhausted, burned out, and overwhelmed. I sometimes have to just tell my kids, "I can’t do this, or I am overwhelmed". There may be something that they really want to do, but we are limited for money, or time, or I am just too tired. I have never felt so exhausted in all of my life, as I have this past year. People have told me, "oh, the year will go by and he'll be back before you know it" and stuff like that. Well, that has not happened for me. This has been one of the longest years of my life. The only other time in my life of which I can compare it to, is from 2006/07, when I was caring for my Mother, and my father had just died. My mother found out she had lung cancer (stage IV) and it was horrible to see her go through the pain and suffering, and those chemo treatments, until she became too weak to do the chemo. My kids and I flew back and forth across the country, from MA to TX and back again, and then we even drove from TX to MA in my SUV (that was an interesting time...).



While I am looking forward to his return, I am also a little bit nervous. After all, people can change over a year’s time. I may not be the person he once knew, I may react differently to things, or what have you. And Pat could be a little different, as well. He did not come home for a visit at his 6 month mark, as most service members do. He decided it would be best to not come home, as it would just upset the kids all the more, when he had to leave again. So he remained in Korea. And because he did not come home at the 6 month mark, he gets to leave Korea a few weeks earlier, which is a plus.

I tried to make the Summer a good one for the boys. We went camping a few times, in our RV, and we have an above ground pool in the back yard, so we used that a lot. The boys were also in Summer School, so many days were tied up because of that. Now that they are all back in school again, and fall is quickly approaching, I am contemplating whether or not to go back to work. We could surely use the money, I could use the time spent with other adults (maybe). But I often get concerned, as I imagine one of the kids getting sick or hurt at school, and I have to go and get them. Or the half-days that the school has once a month. Things like that concern me, what will I do? If I am working, my hands are tied more. I wish I had a simple solution and I could work at home, doing this wonderful thing I love to do and getting paid well for it. But I don’t have a magic solution for that just yet. I haven ‘t quite found that magic solution. Does anyone know where I can get one??? !! If I were a crafty soul, which I can be, with lots of guidance, then I could make money doing that. Work at home jobs are hard to come by. I wish there was more out there. But the economy being the way it is, you know?



So these are my thoughts for the day, what are yours??? I look forward to hearing from you!!